Cindy (names changed for anonymity) was struggling with letting go of a romantic partner from her past. They were fairly young when they dated and it was very hot and cold. Full of passion one minute and then she’d feel invisible the next. 

A real roller coaster ride for her nervous system. 

She loved feeling chased, but when his attention went elsewhere she was left feeling abandoned and alone. So she’d make efforts to get his attention again- fighting to get that affection and attention back. And usually she would. But the “win” began to feel hollow. The whole relationship began to feel like a game and eventually ended when he left her for his newest shiny object. 

Cut to years later Cindy and her former flame reconnected and started a friendship or sorts.

She came to me when it felt as if this friendship had run its course, she’d found the closure she needed from the past through their conversations, but she didn’t know how to complete and move on. She said it felt painful to consider losing this person even though their friendship had become pretty one sided and when she saw him in person she felt those old feelings of not being good enough. Being in his presence she felt uncomfortable in her skin- she didn’t feel like herself. 

We discussed how she attracted this person and why and agreed it was time to let go.

I asked her to drop in and ask internally if there was a part of her resisting this. She immediately went to a time with him where she felt truly happy and she mentioned a specific day from the past. How she felt, what she was wearing, she remembered it all. They were in sync in a way that rarely happened.  A way that she had stuck around to find again, but had not been able to get.

A losing battle. 

I asked her if younger her would like to stay there with him so the current version could go on and live life. Connecting to this younger part of Cindy - she expressed she was the one holding back on letting go the most and would be thrilled to get to stay in that beautiful moment so current Cindy could find a love more resonate for her now. 

I guided Cindy to give permission to this younger version to stay in that place in time as long as she wanted to be there and even make it more comfortable and special in the ways she wanted.  When Cindy opened her eyes after completing this exercise she said she felt ready to release this man from her current life. She took the steps to disconnect and finally let go and move on.  She is now present in her new relationship without the energetic baggage of old flames.

She says she feels free and able to put her energy where she really wants it- with someone who always makes her feel loved consistently. 

If you are struggling with releasing relationships that have passed their due date this is an option to consider… our parts have many different desires and needs and it’s important to listen to them.  In this situation Cindy’s Higher Self knew that cutting ties would be extremely difficult and feel like too big a loss. Letting the younger part stay connected felt like a better way to move on so that’s the direction we followed. 

❤️The Higher Self always knows the best way forward. It’s often surprising to me and my client what the path reveals itself to be, but trusting that intuitive knowing that comes from them always proves to be the best route to healing, closure, and the beginning of new chapters.


Harbor is a 1:1 monthly intuitive life coaching subscription tailored specifically to you. Think gym membership for your soul. Uncover the blocks holding you back, reconnect to your intuition and Higher Self and reprogram outdated beliefs. Navigate obstacles around love, career, and purpose. Achieve your goals with down to earth support and intuitive guidance for $222 US (other currencies available). Cancel anytime. 

Apply for Harbor and Book a Free Discovery Call This 30 minute chat is an opportunity for you to share with me the specific challenges you are facing or goals you are trying to accomplish and see if I’m the right fit to help you BEFORE you commit.